i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I could have mohawked her pubes.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Randomize