I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
