And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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