it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
