Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
