She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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