Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(805): View more from California

An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.

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(425): View more from Washington

we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night

(401): View more from Rhode Island

no, that is not a typo

(401): View more from Rhode Island

i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(513): View more from Ohio

If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would

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(303): View more from Colorado

I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.

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(360): View more from Washington

He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!

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(206): View more from Washington

You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.

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