look no pants
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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