just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
