You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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