she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
