Taylor Swift is so right about you.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.