fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
