Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
