Fine. I'll sleep in my office
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
