My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
