at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
