I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
