Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Panties = found
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