no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Who died my cat blue again?
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
