i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
