Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
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we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
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Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye