I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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