First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize