: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
