my mouth tastes like poor choices
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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