Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
