White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
