Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
