You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
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