thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
