using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Duck Duck Cougar?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
