I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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