dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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