I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
