marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
