how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
