went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
