stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I think people are normalizing furries
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
