yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
