please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
What drink are we having for lunch?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
