you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
