every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
