I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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