Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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