basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
