After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
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It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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