? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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