Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
my poor anus
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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