dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
